


I Didn't Do It For Them

by lovingloki



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: #Angsty, #AvengersInfinityWar, #IWSpoilers, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-05-26 14:09:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15002522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovingloki/pseuds/lovingloki
Summary: Loki already knows what he has to do, but he wants to say goodbye.





	I Didn't Do It For Them

Brother,

I write to you the things I will never be able to tell you in person- and while I stand in blinded faith in front of a man that has become the everlasting darkness in my mind, the person who corrupted my fragmented mind- I write to tell you that I am truly sorry.  
You never deserved any of this; a brother who was a compulsive liar, a brother who betrays you for the smallest reward, a brother who you grew to love and to hate all at the same time, a brother who stabs you in the back- many a time, but you have to admit, back when we were eight I found your reaction highly amusing.

I’m sorry that I’m not the brother you deserved. I’m sorry I’ll never be the person you wanted me to become, that I lived and died being the God of Mischief.

I’m sorry that this time, I will not be coming back.

I ask you not to mourn of me, I ask you not to think of me every minute of every hour and if I have secured a part in Valhalla- I think we both know the answer to that question. But I ask you to do what you have always done best, avenge. Avenge me, brother, like you avenged father and mother. Assemble with those friends you speak so highly of and avenge the world that the titan wishes to lay waste of and avenge me. But at the end of the day, I didn’t do it for them.  
You may think you have nothing left, but that will never be true. Because, at the end of the day, you can, and always have survived without me. You always have done, I was always your shadow- but none of that matters now. Living in your shadow was a life I would not have changed for the world, living in your shadow made me your brother and I honour that so highly.

Back on Sakaah- when you left me in that agony, that I had been craving something that I had been standing beside my entire life. It was always you, Thor. It always has been- living in your shadow has always been my destiny. And I hope that I will remain there with you until you fall and join our mother. You still have so much to live for- you have Asgard to rule like you have always been destined to.  
It’s almost poetic, isn’t it? Dying when we have just fixed what was broken, the time where you finally got your brother back he will sacrifice himself so that you may live. But, I want you to remember this. That I will always be your shadow- even death can’t take that away from us. So as I stand clutching the Tesseract and utter those words, words that will lead you to the dying star, words that mean so much more than that,  
the sun will shine on us again.

The sun will cast a looming shadow that will follow you wherever you wander amongst your beloved Misguard and the other 9 realms, the sun will shine on you and I will be there, always.  
I hope my death will be painless, I anticipate it to be slow though, so I hope that you understand that I am no longer in pain. I have done what needs to be done, I hope you will understand when the note arrives to you.  
Before I leave you, I wanted to tell you something. Something that Thanos has known since the start, my weakness. It’s you, Thor, it’s always been you. My greatest lie was hating you, and it was the worst lie to be told.

I have always loved you, brother, never forget that.

Loki.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoyed that, I didn't enjoy writing it so much! I wanted Loki to have some closure so this is what I would imagine him writing to Thor- feel free to leave comments and kudos with thoughts and feedback!


End file.
